Bed Jokes and Puns

Here are funny bed jokes and puns. Perfect to enjoy right before going to sleep. Also check out our other funny jokes.

Bed Jokes – 5


Two friends who lived in the town were chatting. “I’ve just bought a pig,” said the first. “But where will you keep it?” said the second. “Your yard’s much too small for a pig!” “I’m going to keep it under my bed,” replied his friend. “But what about the smell?” “He’ll soon get used to that.”

Bed Jokes – 8


A friend replaced his bed with a trampoline without telling his partner. She hit the roof.
An old lady is being examined by a doctor who asks her: “Have you ever been bedridden?”
The old lady smiles and says: “I certainly have and I’ve been table ended and back scuttled a few times too!”

Bed Jokes – 9


A husband and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. “You aren’t so good in bed either!” he shouted and stormed off to work. By midmorning, he decided he’d better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone. “What took you so long to answer?”
“I was in bed.” “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”