Bed Jokes - 2

Bed Jokes – 2

How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?
When your nose touches the ceiling!

Bed Jokes - 6

Bed Jokes – 6

You can’t have any more chocolates tonight. It’s not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach. Oh, Mum. I promise I’ll lay on my side.

Bed Jokes - 9

Bed Jokes – 9

A husband and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. “You aren’t so good in bed either!” he shouted and stormed off to work. By midmorning, he decided he’d better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone. “What took you so long to answer?”
“I was in bed.” “What were you doing in bed this late?” “Getting a second opinion.”

Bed Jokes - 4

Bed Jokes – 4

Counselor: How many times did I tell you to make your bed?
Jane: I can’t answer. I didn’t know I was supposed to keep count!

Bed Jokes - 8

Bed Jokes – 8

A friend replaced his bed with a trampoline without telling his partner. She hit the roof.
An old lady is being examined by a doctor who asks her: “Have you ever been bedridden?”
The old lady smiles and says: “I certainly have and I’ve been table ended and back scuttled a few times too!”

Bed Jokes - 5

Bed Jokes – 5

Two friends who lived in the town were chatting. “I’ve just bought a pig,” said the first. “But where will you keep it?” said the second. “Your yard’s much too small for a pig!” “I’m going to keep it under my bed,” replied his friend. “But what about the smell?” “He’ll soon get used to that.”

Bed Jokes - 10

Bed Joke – 10

Why are married women heavier than single women?

Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.

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