College Jokes and Puns

Enjoy these funny college jokes and puns. Perfect for anyone going to college, about to go or just graduated. These jokes about college will make you and your friends laugh and maybe even your teacher. We also have school jokes.

College Math Joke

2018-11-12T14:16:36+00:00

In algebra and calculus classes, I would look at those graphs called “conic sections,” and I either zoned out or freaked out. I just didn’t understand how something could get closer and closer to zero forever. It didn’t make sense to me until I got some credit card bills.

Chemistry Professor Joke

2018-11-12T14:12:58+00:00

Chemistry Professor: Now, class, here I have a beaker of H2SO4, and here I have a gold ring. Suppose I drop the ring into the sulphuric acid. Will the gold dissolve? Student: No. Professor: Good. And will you please tell us why not? Student: If it would dissolve, you wouldn’t put it in.

College Degree Joke

2018-11-12T14:09:40+00:00

A son is calling his mom from college, and telling her that he had just got his degree. The mother says: That’s great honey! What kind of degree? And the son, almost squealing with excitement says: The best one ever, a Celsius degree! 

College Student Joke

2018-11-12T14:03:32+00:00

College student: “Hey, Dad — I’ve got some great news for you!” 
Father: “What, son?” 
College student: “Remember that $500 you promised me if I made the Dean’s list?” 
Father: “I certainly do.” 
College student: “Well, you get to keep it!” 

College Professor Joke

2018-11-12T13:58:07+00:00

One day a college professor after getting irritated in his college class stands up in front of the class and asks if anyone in the class is an idiot, and if there is one then he/she should stand up. After a minute a young man stands up. The professor then asks that guy if he actually thinks he is an idiot. The boy replied, “No, I just didn’t want to see you standing there all by yourself.”

College Delivery Boy Joke

2018-11-12T13:54:15+00:00

After the college boy delivered the pizza to Bud’s trailer house, Bud asked, “What is the usual tip?” “Well,” replied the youth, “this is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I’ll be doing great.” “Is that so?” snorted Bud.
“Well, just to show them how wrong they are, here’s five dollars.” “Thanks,” replied the youth, “I’ll put this in my school fund.” “What are you studying?” asked Bud. The lad smiled and said, “Applied psychology.”