Grandpa Jokes and Puns

Funny Grandpa jokes and puns. They will make you laugh. Also, check out our family and other funny jokes categories.


Grandpa Joke – 2

2017-02-08T20:15:13+00:00

Q: When is your grandpa’s bedtime?
A: Three hours after she falls asleep on the couch.

Grandpa Joke – 6

2017-02-08T20:11:59+00:00

A dying grandfather tells his grandchild, “I want to leave you my farm. That includes the barn, livestock, the harvest, the tractor, and other equipment, the farmhouse and $24,548,750.45 in cash.” The grandchild, absolutely floored and about to become rich says, “Oh grandpa, you are SO generous! I didn’t even know you had a farm. Where is it?” With his last breath, Grandpa whispered, “Facebook…”

Grandpa shoplifting joke

2017-09-14T18:05:46+00:00

My grandpa would always tell me that when he was growing up, in rural Texas, his momma would give him $1 and send him down to the store. He’d come back with 2 loaves of bread, half a gallon of milk, a carton of eggs, and a pound of pork. He says you can’t do that now-a-days, way too many security cameras.

Funny Grandpa joke

2017-09-14T17:58:24+00:00

A little boy comes running Into the room and says, “Grandpa! Grandpa! Can you make a sound like a frog?” The Grandpa says, “I don’t know, why?” The little boy says, “Because grandma says as soon as you croak, we can go to Disneyland!”

Grandpa anniversary joke

2017-09-14T17:54:02+00:00

A couple goes out to dinner to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. On the way home, she notices a tear in his eye and asks if he’s getting sentimental because they’re celebrating 50 wonderful years together. He replies, “No, I was thinking about the time before we got married. Your father threatened me with a shotgun and said he’d have me thrown in jail for 50 years if I didn’t marry you. Tomorrow I would’ve been a free man!”

Grandpa request joke

2017-09-14T17:51:59+00:00

A grandfather from Brooklyn decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. He told her rabbi he had two final requests. First, he wanted to be cremated, and second, he wanted her ashes scattered over Yankee Stadium. “Yankee Stadium!” the rabbi exclaimed. “Why Yankee Stadium?” “Then I’ll be sure my son visits me once a week.”