Horse Jokes and Puns

I put a bet on a horse to come in at 10 to 1 – and it did! Unfortunately all the others came in at 12.30.

How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday? His horse’s name was Friday!

Two horses I know have been an item for ages. They are in a stable relationship.

My horse is a rubbish dancer. I think he’s got two left feet.

How do you get a Rich horse? Find one named Rich.

What’s a horse’s favorite type of story? A fairy tail!

What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air? A seahorse!

Who did the breeder call when his horse was possessed by an evil spirit? An exhorsist!

Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.

A horse walks into a smart cocktail bar. The doorman says: “Wait you can’t come in here without a tie.” The horse goes out to his car, looks in the boot and gets a set of jump leads, which he ties around his neck. He goes back in and says to the barman: “This alright?” The barman says: “Hmm, ok… but don’t be starting anything.”

What is black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

How does a horse from Kentucky greet another horse? With Southern Horspitality!