Salad Jokes and Puns

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Head of Lettuce Joke


One day two heads of lettuce, who were best friends, were walking together down the street. They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over. The uninjured head of lettuce called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. The injured head of lettuce was taken to emergency at the hospital and rushed into surgery. After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. He told the uninjured head of lettuce, “I have good news, and I have bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to pull through.” “The bad news is that he’s going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life”.